An Ode to the Cooking Show

“I don’t cover reality shows” is a sentiment I reiterated as recently as last week. But here I am, standing before you, preparing to write an ode to the good old fashioned cooking show. Or I guess the “food show,” because baking shows are my absolute comfort of choice.

I’m pretty lucky in that TV and movies are my job. Sometimes that can make downtime pretty tricky, though. I do my absolute best not to work while I eat (something I am bad about during lunch but have gotten relatively adept at come dinner time), which means I have a strict rule about not watching stuff that I need to be taking mental notes on. Conversely, traditional “reality shows” are aggressively not for me. And so: food shows.

The thing about cookin’ programs is that there is something for everyone, regardless of which subgenre you fall into. You like your shows cutthroat? There are about fifty Gordon Ramsay series for you (Hell's Kitchen being my flavor of choice, with an honorable mention to Master Chef and Kitchen Nightmares, but never that last one while I’m eating. I don’t cover it for work, there just always seems to be rotting chicken!), as well as Alton Brown’s Cutthroat Kitchen if you want to be on the nose in name but mostly just want to watch some shenanigans unfold. Cozy and kind? Well, obviously the Great British Bake Off is for you. Unhinged? Check out literally any Guy Fieri show. Need to feel good about your skills in the kitchen? Netflix has an entire suite of Nailed It!

All of the above have been in regular rotation in my house since the beginning of quarantine not just because I try not to eat while I work, but because my brain goes into "overworked hard drive" mode too often. I have pretty bad anxiety, and a cooking show is a nice, easy step between grounding exercises and xanax. They also give me something to focus on when my misophonia acts up. (Random noises bad. Structured noises good.) I’m not a big “background noise” kinda gal — and when I am it’s typically some kind of white noise — but a season of Guy’s Grocery Games has been a pleasant addition to my days when there’s considerable busy work to be done.

There really is a food show for whatever you need at any given time. They have ‘em for every holiday now! I’ve lost track of how many iterations of Cupcake Wars we’ve had at this point. That’s not a complaint. I will watch people cooking things literally all day long. Monday was a holiday, during which it rained, and all I did was cocoon myself in 3 blankets and watch Tournament of Champions reruns.

Cooking shows, y’all.

[HBO] Max and Hulu are my 1-2 punch of streaming options for all my cooking goodies for the time being. Netflix gets added into that rotation when GBBO is airing, but Warner Bros. Discovery stopped licensing out the majority of the Food Network back catalogue so everything’s back on Max again, and Hulu’s the place for catching up on shows that are currently airing.

I truly believe that Ramsay has a line in his contract that states he must have a show airing 365 days a year, with the current show du jour being Next Level Chef with Nyesha Arrington and Richard Blais. The three’s personalities clash in a way that’s more fun than Master Chef (though there’s still nothing better than watching Gordon Ramsay’s face when Joe Bastianich disagrees with him on the latter) which adds to the enjoyment, and the absolutely absurd premise only heightens the fun. Basically, each celeb chef takes a team to mentor, swapping between the basement, the middle kitchen, and the top. A platform of food lowers from each level — yes, exactly like the dystopian horror movie The Platform — and the mentees race and throw elbows to get the ingredients they want for their cook in that round. It’s in Season 2 now. Join the madness.

What’s my point? I don’t really have one! I just think cooking shows are nice. Maybe you think cooking shows are nice too and we can talk about your favorites in the comments. That’s probably not how this is going to go, but hey! A girl can dream. I’ll just be over here re-watching Nadiya Bakes episodes!